Adam DeVine’s Guide to Shaving Your Trash


GQ: What are your tips for grooming the most sensitive areas?

Adam DeVine: **Never get too close and pay attention to the ball area. If you cut yourself several times, all of a sudden, you will feel like you have a serious outbreak of herpes on your bag. Not a good look.

GQ: Put “The scientist.”

**Adam DeVine:** Yeah. Take a little trip.

GQ: Does your wisdom on nicknames come from personal experience?

**Adam DeVine:** I’ve cut myself before, and then it’s like a weird explanation for how I don’t have an STD and just cut my balls. But also, girls don’t want to know… It’s like we don’t want to hear how they poop. They’re supposed to be angelic creatures that don’t do anything gross. They don’t want to hear about how we squatted in the bathroom and shaved our nut bags. So you really have to do a good job there, and make it look like, Hey, I’m ready to maintain this. I’m ready to work for you, because I love you and care about you. But also, I don’t work a lot. You don’t want it to look too good. Look good, but don’t look like that’s what you’ve been spending all afternoon on.

GQ: You don’t want your pubes to look like R. Kelly’s goatee.

** Adam DeVine: ** Right. It shouldn’t be too terribly manicured.

GQ: What do you think of women’s expectations of men’s pubes?

**Adam DeVine:** If you get to a place where you take your stuff out, they want to be able to see it. I think that’s the main thing for them. They want to be able to look down and know you have a dick. And if, you know, if you never shave, and you just have a wild jungle out there, and you can’t see the end of it, that’s not where you want to be. And also, let’s say you just have a normal medium sized cock. You cut it off, all of a sudden: Holy moly! Is that a porn pig I trapped over there? It makes the dick much bigger.

GQ: I got it. You don’t want to bury the lead. What else is a turn-off?

**Adam DeVine:** Don’t try to shave his name in your pubic hair. I did it. It was my senior year of high school and my girlfriend’s name was Chelsea. I hope she doesn’t read this, but hey, go with it. She is married now. I tried to put a “C”, a giant “C” in there, and it looked like I screwed up horribly. She was like, “Ew, why did you just leave a horseshoe? Looks like you got hit in the public area by a horse.” And I’m like, “No, I love you…” and she’s like, “Don’t ever do that again.”

GQ: It’s amazing. Do you have any other stray thoughts about pubic shaving?


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